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Subject: TOP 8 MORONS OF 2010 - These are true stories.

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1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP? AT&T fired President John Walter
after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He
received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's
lacking intelligence.


2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS. Police in Oakland, CA, spent two
hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded
himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers
discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police
line, shouting, 'Please come out and give yourself up.'


3. WHAT WAS PLAN B??? An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped
a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated
teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his
own bank accounts!


4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop and asked for
all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was
too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for
three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.


5. DID I SAY THAT??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery
suspect who just couldn't control himself during a lineup.
When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words: 'Give me
all your money or I'll shoot', the man shouted, 'that's not
what I said!'


6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??? A man spoke frantically into the phone: 'My
wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes
apart'. 'Is this her first child?' the doctor asked. 'No!' the man
shouted,'This is her husband!'


7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED! In Modesto, CA, Steven Richard King
was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America
branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun.
Unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.
(hellooooooo)!


8. THE GRAND FINALE!!! Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the
high desert an hour east of Bakersfield, CA, some folks
new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they
couldn't get their brand new 22 foot boat going. It was very
sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power they applied.
After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted into a nearby
marina, thinking someone there may be able to tell them what was wrong. A
thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working
condition. The engine ran fine, the out-drive went up and down, and the
propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina
guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water,
he was laughing so hard.

NOW REMEMBER...THIS IS TRUE. Under the boat, still strapped securely in
place, was the trailer!

roadkill :eek:hno:
 

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Comming from you Roadkill, I almost expected one of those to say all raptor owners...very funny.
 

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The last one and nr.2 was epic
 

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Number 8 definitely takes the cake.
 
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