Are you a Democrat, Republican or a Southerner? - Club700XX - Honda TRX700XX Forum
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post #1 of 18 Old 06-26-2011, 10:43 AM Thread Starter
 
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Are you a Democrat, Republican or a Southerner?

Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?
Here is a little test that will help you decide.

You're walking down a
deserted street with your wife
and two small children.

Suddenly, an Islamic
Terrorist with a huge knife
comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you,
screams obscenities, praises
Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you...

You are carrying a
Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?

Democrat's Answer:

∑ Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

∑ Does the man look poor or oppressed?

∑ Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

∑ Could we run away?

∑ What does my wife think?

∑ What about the kids?

∑ Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

∑ What does the law say about this situation?

∑ Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?

∑ Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

∑ Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

∑ Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

∑ If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

∑ Should I call 9-1-1?

∑ Why is this street so deserted?

∑ We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.

∑ Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

∑ I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.

∑ This is all so confusing!

...............................
Republican's Answer:

BANG!

...........................
Southerner's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG ! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG!
BANG!
BANG!
Click

Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy!'
'Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?! '

Son: 'Can I shoot the next one?!'

Wife: 'You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!

roadkill

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"You lock the door and throw away the key. There's someone in my head, but it's not me."

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post #2 of 18 Old 06-26-2011, 11:01 AM
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Im a Southerner.

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post #3 of 18 Old 06-26-2011, 11:49 AM
 
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I'm a southerner
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post #4 of 18 Old 06-26-2011, 11:55 AM
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Southerner all the way!

"I like my women like I like my coffee.......Full of booze"!
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post #5 of 18 Old 06-26-2011, 12:24 PM
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I'm a southerner.

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post #6 of 18 Old 06-26-2011, 01:29 PM
 
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Lol! I'm an independent but BANG and if possible hit a few passer by democrats, lol!

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post #7 of 18 Old 06-26-2011, 02:37 PM
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I am definitely a southerner.

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post #8 of 18 Old 06-26-2011, 03:16 PM
 
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I think if I were a crack shot, I'd shoot out his knees and torture the asshole. What does that make me?


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post #9 of 18 Old 06-26-2011, 06:11 PM
 
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lol, this was obviously written by a republican southerner. The cops took my Glock away, so I guess I woulda got knifed. lol

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post #10 of 18 Old 06-26-2011, 08:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xx700xx View Post
I think if I were a crack shot, I'd shoot out his knees and torture the asshole. What does that make me?
Wrote many novels while being snowed in?

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